A Paid Advertisement by Ralph Nader

Funny story written by Morgan Truce

Sunday, 6 June 2004

image for A Paid Advertisement by Ralph Nader
Testifying before Congress on the danger of #2 pencils.

To my fellow Arab American Citizens:

As you know, my parents came to this country from Lebanon.

My father opened up a little bakery in Connecticut and dreamed that one day his son would help destroy this evil America.

If only my father were here now so he could see how much I have accomplished.

While attending Princeton University, I was instrumental in stamping out all fun on campus.

After graduation, I took on the decadent men's fashion industry and made everyone dress like me.

I helped America's former enemies Germany and Japan in their efforts to destroy the automobile industry in the United States.

I entered politics to help our Arab conspiracy bring down America.

In 2000, I was successful in keeping Al Gore out of the White House and helped that idiot George W. Bush steal the election from the Democrats.

With your help, I will do the same to John Kerry this coming fall.

Thank you for your continued support.

I'm Ralph Nader, and I approved this message.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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