MONEY: "Dont spend it, steal everything you need"
SEX: "Every tart is fair game except yer dear old Mum".
BEEF: "Easy to milk, a fucker to slaughter, if you do have
a Daisy away from the farm, get yourself a mate that
knows how to use a chainsaw"
NOSE HAIR: "A good cigarette lighter does the trick"
PETROL: "Use unleaded, the forensics hate it, they cant
lift yer dabs after a good brew up!"
PARKING: "Get yerself one of them disabled badges, and
remember to limp when walking away from the car"
NOISE: "If the cunts next door wont give it a rest,
stick the sawn off through the letter box, but
only use the one barrel"
TURNIPS: "What the fuck are they all about?"
