Laced ...

Funny story written by walter

Sunday, 18 December 2011


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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According to Greek mythology, the beginnings of things started with Chaos or yawning nothingness, and Genesis says 'The earth was without form and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep'.

Then came the 10th Commandment-'thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's'.

Herodotus (400 B.C.), in Ancient Greek mythology, reports of stoning victims to death- Oedipus asked to be stoned to death when he learned that he had killed his father. In Judaism, the punishment for sexual intercourse between a man and a woman engaged to another man is stoning to death.

Practically, standing laws of any nation is indicative of what crimes they commit; therefore, in spite of all laws passed or commandments carved, people engage in adultery and fornication. In the Book of Genesis, we find the story of Joseph and Zulaikha, wife of Potipharm, the captain of the palace guard.

Who knows why a sixteen-year-old female voluntarily rides in a stranger's car to get engaged in fornication? Is it because of curiosity or some innate drive? What about an aristocrat female sleeping with a mason, Lady Chatterley's Lover by D. H. Lawrence? This book could not be published in the United Kingdom under the Obscene Publications Act, 1959.

There are many love stories in the history of mankind and thousands of honor killings, all pivoting on sex. If we take the charming females out of the contemporary TV shows, what is left? On the other hand, sex seems to be an amenity bestowed upon man. Are we immune? Let's put ourselves in a man's shoe who got involved in such affairs.

"I was in that flat for repair job. The husband fully trusted me; therefore, he left me with his wife, in her 20's. I was much older than her. I was sitting on the floor, when the repair work required something soft like a blanket. I asked the wife of the house, if she could provide me with a blanket. She said the spare blankets were placed on the top shelf of the wardrobe. Asked me to wait a minute.

"She placed a chair next to the wardrobe and a rickety stool on the top. She got on the chair and climbed on the stool, a precarious move. I could not ignore the unsafe climbing. When I looked up, her back was to me. She had a short flowing skirt on, now pulled way up. What I saw riveted my eyes: her lace panties. I fumbled for some words to allow me to the do the job, but she said she was almost done.

"At this time, when she reached higher, the stool started wobbling. Unconsciously, I grabbed her both thighs. She dropped the blanket, but remained steady. For how many seconds I kept my hands on her bare thighs, I don't recall. Then, I let her slid down while my hands slid upward and rested on her breasts.

"She did not resist at all. I could hear my heart pounding. She safely reached the floor, but I had still my hands around her chest. Without turning around, she faced the door leading to the bedroom. My hands were still on her breasts. She moved and I followed her. We both reached the edge of the bed. She gently bent over, placed her chest on the bed, her knees on the floor, lifted her skirt and pulled down her laced lingerie."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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