Tripoli Under Siege Part 2: Only Mama Knows

Funny story written by Jean Le Fete

Monday, 23 May 2011

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...Just then a cell phone rang in Edward's shirt pocket. He took it out and held it to his ear. A loud inhuman shriek pierced the air as he held it away from his ear, followed by an explosion. He looked at the screen to see the number.

"That's her number..." said Edward.

"What was that?"

"The scream was her, the explosion? God only knows, might be the local ammo dump getting hit by Mogambo. That's what they're calling the rebels in Kenya these days."

"Mogambo?" I asked incredulously, "That's Swahili for sexual congress you know?"

"Oh, so you remember some Swahili?" he asked.

"Yes Bwana, I remember plenty," I replied.

"Good cuz yer gonna need it where were going," said Edward.

"I'm not going anywhere," I said finishing my beer and stepping around behind the bar.

"Sam, this isn't a choice, Dad requested the two of us spread his ashes...together. Mom is expecting it too, that's why she's..."

"Hallucinating hippos in her bedroom?" I finished for him.

"There's another reason, if you ever want your inheritance and the 6 grand I owe you, this has to be done."

"That's 7 grand you owe me, but I don't need Dad's money."

"You don't need 400,000?"

I paused and looked at Franz who raised his eyebrows, a half smirk on his lips. Just then, there was a huge explosion and the entire building shook, then began shattering around us. Franz and I ducked under the bar, I instinctively grabbed my AK-47, but there would be no need.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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