Bear High in America

Written by j.w.

Sunday, 17 April 2011

image for Bear High in America
Bear Carefully Hidden Up a Tree

A Special report from our roving Bear correspondent somewhere in the United States has reached our desk:

A Bear wearing its new jersey has been found high in an American Pine Tree. 'I just floated up here man' the happy Bear told me as I climbed up to have a word 'I saw this distant cousin of mine, Pooh Bear floating with a balloon taking him for a ride and I thought - I CAN DO THAT!'

Local residents who did not like their tree occuppied by a Bear wearing a jersey called in local Bear experts at the fire brigade. 'Not another Bear high on drugs' complained one of the firefighters 'it must be those immigrant bears from Mexico, you see floating bears all over the place down there, I've heard.'

Eventually Sam Bear came down to earth and in a dazed and confused state started telling everyone how smelly Pooh Bear was. He found it a great joke. 'Got any weed, Man?' he asked me as he stumbled across the earth which he said was in the middle of the sea.

I replied that as a responsible Bear I had nothing to do with weeds. 'Oh man' he said 'you really knock me out!'

If you see a Bear high up in a tree think of Sam Bear and thank him for raising the Bear Profile.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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