Written by Bureau

Wednesday, 23 February 2011

image for Today's News With Rush Limbo: #3
Postage going up?

Today's News With Rush Limbo:

"Welcome to everyone, especially my loyal "Peckerheads".

The US Post Office is still threatening to close on Saturdays or begin charging 95 cents for a stamp. In a national poll that was conducted last week, 92% of those polled said that they agree with the post office.

"Give them Saturdays off. Charge more for stamps too if you have to. Please, please don't hurt us!"

San Francisco may make circumcision illegal. Here the whole world is going to hell in a hand basket and they're checking dicks. Maybe they can do that with the Airport scans.

Justin Bieber has told The Rolling Stone that he's against abortion in all cases except ...ME! OK, Turdley, This is not funny! I may rag you a bit from time to time but I seldom do it in a sneaky way like this.

Seats on one side of the Indiana House were nearly empty today as House Democrats departed the state rather than vote on anti-union legislation. Ironically, they have headed for Madison, Wisconsin. They are moving into the empty houses of the Wisconsin teachers that are in Illinois. So if you're using a scorecard. Never mind.

Aren't you glad these Dems are running the war in Iraq and Afghanistan? 'There's a lone Taliban on that mountain and it looks like he has a pair of nail clippers. I can see him in my binoculars.


In Arkansas, they say they still want to protect their citizens froma runaway Toyota, even though they are saying they are safe. Just as soon as Spring arrives, they will begin planting trees every ten feet all up and down the interstates.

We'll be right back after this commercial break..."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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