Assange Arrest Fully Exonerates U.S. Government

Funny story written by manbrad

Tuesday, 7 December 2010


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The arrest today of Julian Assange on trumped up sex charges has fully cleared the U.S. government of any and all wrongdoing.

No credible source actually stated this but most media outlets have done their best to allow the belief that "Julian Assange is some kind of pervert" to become the major issue before the public.

Despite the fact that all leaked documents originated inside the U.S. government and were generated by U.S. government employees and entities based on undisputed facts, major American media outlets have continuously fixated on a vague set of charges that have kind of been brought by the Swedish government although that very government has been less than forthcoming in actually bringing concrete and specific charges against the face of Wikileaks.

Included in the exonerations are:

1) the war in Afghanistan is winnable and the reason it has gone on so long is because it's all part of the NATO master plan;

2) Iraq is a fully functioning democracy and from invasion to evacuation the U.S. government handled everything masterfully;

3) every member of the government of Afghanistan is as honest as the day is long;

4) the U.S. government deals with full good faith with every other government of every other nation in the world and most importantly;

5) the United States government never does anything without the full consent and acquiescence of its citizens.

The American public, enlightened as it is by a vigorous free press, was happy to find out that Wikileaks' revelations were just the twisted fantasies of a filthy sex maniac and not the actual doings of its own government.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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