Wikileaks Founder Claims He is Developing Nuclear Weapon?

Funny story written by Charpa93

Sunday, 5 December 2010


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United States intelligence sources are claiming that Wilileaks Founder, Julian Assange's recent release of highly sensitive cables is just the tip of the iceberg of what Assange is truly capable of. They paint the picture of a man who considers himself to be one of the most important figures in shaping the way the countries of the world relate to each other.

They also claim that because of the nature of the material he has been made privy to, he has all the tools and highly-classified information available to produce his very own nuclear weapon, and is in the process of procuring the services of some of the world's best nuclear physicists to do just that.

Some who know Assange the best claims that he is an adrenaline junkie and thrives on the high he gets when delivering a punch, such as the latest classified information leak to millions of ordinary citizens, and watching the reaction of the diplomatic personnel of the world as they try and mop up the mess he leaves them with.

But Assange has said himself that it is becoming increasingly harder to get the same high, and he feels he must do something so extraordinary that it will shock even himself. Hence, he has enlisted the aid of a few renegade scientists from around the world to develop for him his very own nuclear device with a red button attached, just like the one used by the White House.

"By holding certain parts of the world hostage with my ability to blow them to smithereens," said Assange, "I can finally attain my life's ambition-to be the most feared and respected ordinary man on the face of the earth," which he then followed with a deeply loud and hysterical "muah ha ha ha ha."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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