Isle of Wight News - Lady Gardeners

Funny story written by IainB

Tuesday, 13 July 2010

image for Isle of Wight News - Lady Gardeners
Lady Gardeners are expert at caring for a lady's lawn

The following is an advertisement

Lady Gardeners
Lady Gardeners understand that women who live alone sometimes prefer if their hired help are not men, and our team of extra friendly women are on call seven days a week to visit where you need us most.

Lady Gardeners can visit you in your home at your convenience, we offer the highest service and understand your needs and how to achieve your desires. We'll freshen you up for spring, or tidy you up for winter.

Lady Gardeners can tidy your bushes, care for your lawns and tame your jungle. We will never put anything in your garden you don't want there, but all of our customers call us back, because we know what they want in their garden.

Lady Gardeners can help you put the most in and get the most out of your garden. We understand the needs of the single lady's garden, and we won't leave you disappointed.

Lady Gardeners know how much a lady's garden means to her, and we will treat it tenderly, unlike the rough male gardeners who don't care how the lady feels after they have come and gone.

After a service from Lady Gardener's here are some quotes from highly satisfied customers:

"I would definitely call on Lady Gardener's again next time my big bush needs trimming" - Tanya Hyde, Ventnor.

"Seeing Lady Gardeners in my beds gives me a little thrill of excitement at what wonders they will perform" - Brenda Bender, Cowes.

"I last had a male gardener, but after being with a Lady Gardener just once, it's turned me off men for good!" - Yvette Hedge, Ride.

If you are a lady with a garden, and you would like one of our girls to call round for a quick glance at your garden, or a more in depth rummage, please call us on Ventnor (555) 8876.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more