BUM (bum) n.
Female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes look bigger.
Male: The organ for mooning (and farting).
COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female: A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.
COMMUNICATION (ko-muu-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the lads.
ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female: A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male: Sex.
FEAR OF (feer ov) n.
Female: Smudged make up, Wrinkles Nylons, Child Birth, Being left on the shelf, Financially problems, The ironing, Sexual encounters, Hair conditioning, Appearance, Loneliness, Poor image, Child's future, Sexual abuse, Getting old, Arachnophobia, Rejection.
Male: Shopping.
FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion.
Male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding.
LESBIAN (lez-bee-an) n.
Female: A woman who makes love to another woman.
Male: A woman who has sex with other women so men can watch.
MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male: What women do while the man is shagging.
REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every 2 minutes.
THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female: Any part under a car's bonnet.
Male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male: Playing cricket without a box.
