Written by Ben Salz

Tuesday, 20 April 2010

Former GOP vice-presidential candidate and now FOX News commentator, Sarah Palin is rolling up her sleeves. Not so that she can get to work helping people like Joe the Plumber, but rather so she can read the notes scribbled on her hands.

What kind of notes, you ask? Well, after reviewing literally minutes of film footage of Ms. Palin's appearances at campaign rallies, interviews, and debates, I've been able to zoom in closer to read several notes scribbled on this sweet piece of veep meat's pageant-tested body and decipher them for your entertainment and of course, the Library of Congress.

Stay Folksy

Soviet Union = Russia

Don't high-five Sen. McCain (injured in Civil War)

I am Commander-in-Chief of Alaska National Guard

District of Columbia??

More legs, less talk

Deficit = Bad, Surplus = Good

Invite Katie Couric on "hunting trip"

Delaware -> place where Joe Biden lives


The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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