Written by MonkeyInTheBath

Sunday, 15 March 2009

image for An explanation of soccerball
A soccerball huddle

Howdy, folks, I'm Randy. And my name is Jed.

I'm here to introduce y'all to that sport they play in foreign countries, soccerball. Here in the good old USA it's a sport for women and children, but in Europe it's played by men! But before you go thinking it's a sport for sissies, they don't wear any body armour or padding at all. These guys are tough.
Soccerball has quite a few differences from the football that we know and love, like in soccerball you're not allowed to touch the ball with your hands. The two teams play for a massive 45 minutes without a break, which is a long time to go without a cheeseburger. You'd better eat a big meal before you start.

Another difference is that the goal has to be scored by making a touchdown inside the little goalmouth, unlike football where you can score a goal anywhere in the end zone. And for scoring a goal you get a measly one point. No wonder soccerball is so boring and low scoring.
But tactically it is not so different from football. You have to have a good offense and defense, and it's important to have good quarterbacks who can stop the opposing team's wide receivers from attacking your backfield.

So there y'all are. I hope this has helped you to learn about that funny round-ball game, so next time someone asks you what you think of the Manchester Reds (they're a famous team from Germany), you'll know what to say.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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