AssFrFred: How could you defend your high school's football recruiting?

Written by Pointer

Monday, 26 January 2009

image for AssFrFred: How could you defend your high school's football recruiting?
AssFrFred's Roman Collar Rules All!

Dear A$$FF44giveness,

As a loyal supporter and lifelong admirer of your very catholic leadership, I must humbly ask how it is possible that you defended illegal recruiting practices and had the unmitigated gall to appeal the AIAA decision that your school's recruiting policies were in violation of league rules?

Your athletic supporter.

Dear Jock,

It is true that I traveled to Phoenix to protest the suspension of our football team from next year's payoffs, I mean, playoffs because two of our coaches were allegedly involved in recruiting a young fella to play on our team. Clearly Arizona Athletic Officials are unfamiliar with the catholic methods for seduc...I mean,, that's not it...attracting young people to our excellent youth development programs.

Some have argued that my defense even violated Catholic teaching. Yes, our church teaches that there is a communal dimension to ethical and unethical behavior and therefore my argument that students who had nothing to do with the infraction will suffer from the consequences actually fails to acknowledge my own religion's moral principles. To those sticklers who insist on faithfulness to the letter and spirit of the law , I simply say:

My Roman Collar Rules All!!!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more