Written by Bureau

Sunday, 7 December 2008

Last week, someone in the California justice department secretly copied some of the reasons Britney Spears told the judge why she was filing for divorce against husband Kevin Federline two years ago. Although the official cause was irreconcilable differences, the one page that was smuggled out and copied has been released.

Following are some of the reasons Britney gave at the hearing:

Kevin is always so negative and I'm never never negative. Just ask my psychiatrist, Doctor Bennington.

He likes to hide my panties.

Our fan clubs could absolutely not get along.

Staring contests over the 1PM breakfast table, over who's turn to change the baby.

He kept wearing those same old stinky biscuits that he ran in.

Always, always flashing his GED certificate during an argument over the babies or who got the last Ding Dong.

I just like knew it was over when he began using the bathroom with the door open, sounding off like a horse!

I admit that I went in and stood up and peed over the commode to let him know I could leave the lid down too.

That was right after he hid my panties.

As of this morning, Los Angeles authorities are seeking the person who copied the partial court record.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more