Cicada Slurpee Recipe

Written by Morgan Truce

Friday, 28 May 2004

image for Cicada Slurpee Recipe

Catch one quart of cicadas * with large net.
In a blender, mix cicadas with:
1 cup of sugar
6 cups water
1T flax seed
1/4 t salt
1 whole lemon

Blend at high speed for 3 minutes.

Serve immediately.

* Locusts may be substituted for cicadas if you are lucky enough to find them in your backyard.

CAUTION: Cicada slurpees may cause dizziness, hair loss, nausea, flatulence, blindness, sexual impotence, and death.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more