Anthea Redfern - "My Hell With Sir Bruce Forsyth"

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Saturday, 11 June 2011


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Can I Stop Fucking Twirling Now Sir Bruce?

Following years of dignified silence, Anthea Redfern, former wife of Sir Bruce Forsyth has confided in close friends that her marriage to Sir Bruce was "absolute hell."

Redfern, who acted as Sir Bruce's assistant on the hit TV show 'The Generation Game' ended up being romanced by the show's host and top man, eventually marrying him at around about the time that The Human League were number one in the pop charts with 'Don't You Want Me Baby.'

She insists today that she was young and naive at the time, and not fully aware of what she was letting herself in for. Within two years of the marriage, Redfern had checked herself into a private clinic, where she was treated for dizzy spells and splitting headaches.

An associate put Redfern's medical state down to Sir Bruce continually requesting that the leggy Anthea 'give him a twirl.' Apparently Sir Bruce became obsessed with 'twirling' and had Redfern twirling around the house, sometimes for hours on end. Sometimes the twirling went on all night, and even when the couple went out for a private dinner or to a function, Sir Bruce would have the unfortunate Anthea in a state of almost constant twirling.

"It got completely out of control," a close associate of Redfern's revealed. "He'd have her almost constantly in a state of twirl. She'd be twirling as she went upstairs, twirling in the shower, twirling around in the kitchen, and even twirling as she watched her favourite TV show, Dallas, on the telly. It was sad, but in the end divorce was the only solution. A girl just can't cope with twirling 24/7."

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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