Alex Reid Denied Access To Celebrity Party After Baftas

Funny story written by dutch

Wednesday, 16 February 2011

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Alex Reid was turned away from a party which was being held for celebrities after the Baftas.

Bouncers refused to admit him into the party despite his protestations. He was unable to produce a "golden ticket" and so was not allowed entry into the party.

The muscle was said to be 'gutted' that the trimmings of the celebrity life style he enjoyed with Jordan are being denied him now that they are no longer an item.

Alex has also been told to hand back the keys to a £245,000 red sports car which his beloved had bought him. He said, "Her name is on the cars ownership documents so there is nothing I can do."

Poor Alex has realized that his 'fifteen minutes of fame' are almost up and he is paranoid about no longer being accepted as a bona fide 'celebrity'. He said that as a winner of Big Brother he should automatically be invited to big celebrity events.

A friend of Alex said that he is feeling like "Billy No Friends" and has no one to turn to as vengeful Jordan has turned all his friends against him.

He has said that he will not be getting very much in the way of a financial settlement and that it is an 'absolute farce' after all he has been through. Alex whinged that he had spent an absolute fortune on expensive presents for Jordan and her kids and had received nothing in return except a broken heart.

He said 'Nobody wants to know you when you are down on your luck, even the gym won't allow me entrance as my pass is in Jordan's name."

Jordan's ex-husband Peter Andre says he knows exactly what the 'poor guy' is going through, 'I've been there, done that, and got the T-shirt' said Pete. He is said to have sympathy with Alex even though he once hated 'the guy's guts'. Andre is said to have advised Alex to try and get on next year's "I'm A Celebrity". Peter said, "Alex will be perfect for 'I'm a Celebrity' I'll have to give Ant and Dec a call and try and put a good word in for the fellow."

Jordan is said to be paranoid that her two exes are in 'cahoots' with one another and are plotting against her to try and get her kids.

A psychiatrist said that Miss Katie Price is showing all the classic signs of paranoia and she seems to think that everyone is against her. The feisty glamour model is not let her separation get to her and she is on the look at for a potential new partner. She said "They don't call me the Black Widow for nothing."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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