Written by anthonyrosania

Friday, 10 December 2010

image for Howard Stern to Sirius: Let's Make It An Even Billion. I'll Stay Until 2015.

AARP-eligible shock-jock Howard Stern has locked himself into a dying medium, signing with nearly-bankrupt Sirius/XM for another five years, and $500 million.

The previous five-year agreement, which began in 2006 and runs through the end of this month, paid Stern $100 million a year in cash and stock.

"The downside of the original deal was that the stock they paid me in was Sirius stock," said Stern. "Now they have to pay me in, like, Apple's stock, or Walmart. Stock that will have some value in five years.

Sirius/XM is trading at about $1.35, up substantially from its historical low of $0.52 in December of 2009, but a sh-tload lower than its $8.00 price in 2006.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more