X Factor Decisions: Spoof Writers To Blame!

Funny story written by Ellis Ian Fields

Tuesday, 16 November 2010

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Spoof correspondent filing copy.

In an extraordinary rant an X Factor insider has blamed satirical news site TheSpoof for some of the bizarre decisions that have been made on the show.

"You bastards keep giving the crap performers the oxygen of publicity," he said.

"Why can't you mind your own business and stick to sending up politicians, footballers, members of the royal family and other gang members*?

"If you didn't keep writing about the stupid tart Waissel or the bonkers Wagner no-one would care.

"Katie has a breakdown and you're all over it! If you weren't, we could quietly push her to one side.

"As it is, you create interest in these deadlegs, people tune in to the show in their thousands and the judges feel duty bound to keep voting the tossers back on.

"The idea was X Factor was supposed to have been a nice quiet talent show where we could find some serious new performers.

"But the likes of TheSpoof have turned it into freak show. That was never the plan.

"Why can't you take a leaf out of the tabloids' book and do some serious reporting on the serious issues, dammit?

A regular TheSpoof correspondent and head of EIF News & Features, Eliis Ian Fields, said: "Twat!"

(*Courtesy Monty Python's Flying Curcus.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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