Spinal Tap Reunion Tour Goes to 11 on 11/11

Funny story written by P.M. Wortham

Friday, 12 November 2010

image for Spinal Tap Reunion Tour Goes to 11 on 11/11
St. Hubbins on Lead Guitar

The long wait for a Spinal Tap reunion tour is now over as the gifted three set foot on stage for the first time in over 11 years last night at the Grand Theater in Leeds, U.K.

Pushing the limits of technology in their heyday, Spinal Tap was the first rock band to take guitar amplifiers one more notch past the normal limit of "10" on the dial. This was also apparently the inspiration for the reunion tour as described by David St. Hubbins from the band, "We wanted to call it the Eleven Tour, you know, because we invented that amplifier, and because we've been off tour for 11 years, and that's about all I think, yeah".

New promoters for Spinal Tap had originally advised waiting a year so that they could firm up tour dates and venues, taking advantage of a unique calendar date in the process. Spokesman for the promotion agency, Haywood Jabookit says, "We had hoped to kick off the reunion tour on 11/11/11 at 11:11:11 PM. That would have really kicked ass. I mean, you just can't buy that sort of karma or publicity".

"Except that Nigel was late on a paternity suit payment and we had to cash in as quickly as possible", says St. Hubbins referring to his band mate, Nigel Tufnel. "I mean, we kicked off the reunion a bit early, yeah? But it was on 11/11 of 2010. Good enough, I say. Like pork pie on a Tuesday night, eh?"

With St. Hubbins, Tufnel and Derek Smalls rounding out three of the original four band members, they took a knee in remembrance of Mick Shrimpton, their former drummer. Shrimpton spontaneously exploded on the drum kit more than 15 years ago, while new drummer, Colin Snareman was welcomed by the band as a fitting and talented replacement.

True to form, St. Hubbins ran on stage with the energy of a 20 year old, save for the grey streaks in his shoulder length hair. The band was scheduled to open with "Lick my Love Pump" from the triple platinum album "Smell the Glove". Timing the first chord of the song to start at 11 o'clock exactly and with amplifiers turned up to 11, Hubbins, Smalls and Tufnel struck their strings in unison causing an explosion of the main amplifiers situated behind Snareman. Snareman was launched out of his chair and into an awaiting crowd who passed him around the main floor like a pizza box.

Taking the prophetic accident in stride, Smalls turned up his bass to create louder down beats in place of the now missing drummer. By all accounts, it was an epic performance. The energy in the crowd was as free flowing and infectious as was the cloud of fine Michoacan bud floating around the main floor. And though audience members flooded emergency rooms after the performance with complaints of complete hearing loss, a good time was had by all.

The Reunion Tour Live Album is slated for production early in 2011 to continue the mojo of the "Eleven" phenomenon. The CD will be titled, "Hold my Sausage".

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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