Kim Kardashian Explains Why She Has Gained So Much Weight Lately

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Sunday, 7 November 2010

image for Kim Kardashian Explains Why She Has Gained So Much Weight Lately
Reliable sources say that Kim Kardashian has been eating three birthday cakes a day.

BEVERLY HILLS - Kim Kardashian, one-third of the famed Kardashian sisters, was asked by a reporter for National Geographic why it is that her weight has ballooned upwards in just the past few weeks.

Kardashian, who was shopping at the 'big gal' section of the fashionable Beverly Hills Boutique, La Muchachota of Rodeo Drive, smiled and said that her weight gain is due to her being on the milkshake and birthday cake diet.

Kim giggled as she explained that yes it is in fact true that she has gained quite a lot of weight during the month of October and into early November.

She was asked by the reporter if her weight gain was brought on by the fact that she was depressed over her breakup with Dallas Cowboys receiver Miles Austin and the fact that the Cowboys are currently (1-6).

Kardashian laughed and replied that neither Miles nor the Cowboys dismal record had anything to do with her weight gain.

She was then asked if she was merely going through a period that many Hollywood starlets go through where they eat everything that they can get their celebrity hands on.

Kim took the ham and cheese sandwich out of her mouth and stated that the real reason that she has gained so much weight is because she is preparing for her next movie role.

She added that she has signed on to star in the Candlelight Motion Picture film I'm One Hungry Bitch - The Kirstie Alley Story.

Kim said that she will be portraying Alley as she goes from being a heavy 268 pounds to a super heavy 409 pounds in a period of seven short months.

SIDENOTE: Kirstie Alley was originally asked by the movie producers to be a creative consultant but she declined when they refused to pay her in food.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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