The faces of Mariah Carey's managers are as red as her gelatinous ass, after the Weeble-like singer fell on stage during a concert in Singapore, injuring several dancers, damaging the crane used to hoist her upright...
... And, geologists say, the Earth's crust.
"There is a fissure, extending about 3 miles underneath the basalt rock in the continental crust underneath Singapore," said a local geologist. "This fissure, which can cause devastating earthquakes, did not exist until Mariah Carey's second encore.
The phenomenon, known as the "Sidibe-Mo'Nique Principle", was first identified during the filming of the Academy Award-winning film "Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire, Based on the News Article 'Fatass', by Toaster."
"A similar fissure was identified in Brooklyn, where a scene of the movie was filmed," explained some American geologist, which makes him more gooder than the guy from Singapore. "It followed a Seismic event that coincided with the 'Precious' character falling down the steps."
"We expect Singapore to experience a huge Seismic event," concluded the geologist. "Which could completely destroy Singapore. Not that anyone would know for weeks because... Well, do they... do they even have phones in Singapore?"
