Tiger Woods Tearful Appeal: Tells Elin He'll Drop Golf, Affairs If She Withdraw Divorce Papers

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Monday, 23 August 2010

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Tiger Woods has told close friends of Elin Nordegren that he will drop all the running around on her and give up golf entirely if she will come back to him and bring the kids and let the divorce (just granted) go.

"I think he really, really misses those kids and that he's still in love with Elin", stated Ellen Finestein, a close friend of Nordegren. "What's more, I think the finality of the divorce has hit him hard."

That seems to be the message from Tiger at this time.

He stated that the other women were about sex, not love, and that he wants to have a fresh start, according to Finestein.

"Elin and I met each other when a staff member got our first names confused at a Hotel in Manhattan once. That was about 7-8 years ago", stated Ellen.

She stated that Tiger had gradually gotten himself into more and more trouble and was spending heavily to cover everything up until it exploded in his face.

"No wonder he's not winning any golf tournaments. He can't concentrate."

Woods has told a member of Elin's family the same thing. He also believes that Woods wants his family back.

"He would like to play golf, even if it's only the Majors. But I think he would like to play just enough to stay sharp and spend the rest of his time with his wife and children."

Too late? We'll see!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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