Robert Pattinson to Play Raoul Moat in Story of Moat's Life

Funny story written by Charpa93

Saturday, 10 July 2010

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Film producers have already found a screenplay they are adapting to film about the life and times of Raoul Moat and they want Robert Pattinson to play the lead role. Pattinson has accepted, claiming he wants to work on other roles so that he's not pigeon-holed for life as a vampire.

"Sure," said Pattinson, "I so totally want to branch out and playing the life of a deranged killer may just be my break-out vehicle. This is the kind of dramatic role I can really sink my teeth into."

To get into the head of Moat, Pattinson is said to be starting on a daily regimen of steroids and is being counseled by a psychiatrist as to how a narcissist thinks and acts.

So far, the psychologist working with Pattinson is impressed with how quickly he is taking on the persona of Moat. "It's as if he has some instinctive knowledge into the workings of someone who thinks very highly of himself and believes he is the best at everything he does. It's downright uncanny."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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