Alex Reid Says "I'm Bigger Than Jesus"

Funny story written by Hartley

Saturday, 24 April 2010

image for Alex Reid Says "I'm Bigger Than Jesus"
Alex Reid makes quite a claim to fame

Alex Reid, cage-fighting cross-dressing pet husband of Katie Price has claimed his fame level has now reached very dizzy heights.

Overly-tanned to the point of becoming a possible BNP manifesto target, and styled as a Roman gladiator, the muscle-bound meat-head earlier held a press conference to promote his new TV show. Alex was accompanied by a bevy of beautiful female models all dressed in almost authentic pink roman sequin bikinis. For once his wife was nowhere to be seen.

With a physique reminiscent of 1980s cartoon character, Bananaman, Reid looked overly confident as he told the press-pack, "I'm bigger than Jesus now! How amazing is that? He never had his own TV show like what I've got, and I've definitely had more headlines than him this year."

When asked if he thought this might be a bit of a bold claim from someone who would struggle to beat the belching man in a Britain's Non Talent audition, an oblivious Reid replied, "I've got my own TV show. How amazing is that? I always knew I'd be a megastar one day."

The former bit-part Hollyjokes actor and martial arts enthusiast has always had a drive to be famous for being famous. A dream he managed to fulfil when he became the stooge in Price's post-split plan to turn her ex-husband, Peter Andre, from orange to green.

Initially he was reportedly hired by Price to appear in some staged paparazzi shots for high-brow celeb magazine Conceit. However when Andre failed to beg Price to put their marriage back together and divorced her, his ex ramped up the stakes by intensifying her relationship with Alex and marrying him on the rebound.

Reid, who was weirdly first outed to the tabloids as a cross-dresser by Katie Price, finally got fame in his own right when he won Celebrity Big Bother earlier this year. Riding high on the back of his success as an unreality star he was offered his own satellite TV show. The show is entitled The Tights Of His Life and sees Reid travel the world meeting other cross-dressing martial artists. At the end of each show Reid takes his guests on in a fight in tights.

An anonymous source who is very close to Reid snarled from her botox injected face, "He's totally off his head! He's not the star in this marriage! He's nowhere near as famous as he thinks he is. I mean - he's never even been spoofed without me being in it!"

Nick Clegg commented, "I guess Dave and Gordon will be blaming me for this travesty of a TV show being on air."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more