Image of Jesus seen in Christine Bleakley

Written by Bill Licks

Saturday, 13 March 2010

image for Image of Jesus seen in Christine Bleakley
Bleakley reveals the blisters on her palms after her marathon water-ski

Roly poly West Brom fan and presenter of BBC1's The One Show, Adrian Chiles, claims he had a 'highly religious moment' when he saw the face of Jesus.

Not in the bottom of a saucepan or on a piece of mouldy bread like normal members of the public do. Chiles witnessed the vision in the face of his glamorous co-presenter, Christine Bleakley.

It happened when he was sat on the boat that was towing the Irish beauty as she attempted to water-ski across the English Channel.

'All of a sudden I witnessed a beam of light shining down on her,' said the bearded Brummy who isn't a Brummy because he's from North Worcestershire. 'I looked at Christine and I saw her flowing tousled hair blowing in the wind and what appeared to be a five o'clock shadow on her prominent jaw. '

'As she was water-skiing I thought to myself no normal human being could stay on the surface of the water for that length of time so maybe she was being aided by a higher being.'

'One that was a renowned water walker.'

'None other than the son of God himself.'

'Jesus Christ.'

'I'm not a religious man but that spiritual moment made me believe that she really is a very special lady indeed. You could almost say I worship the ground she walks on.'

'If only she felt the same way about me. I'm funny. I'm cuddly and I can grow facial hair that would knock the socks off any Chelsea mid-fielder.'

'What's fatty Frank got that fatty Adrian hasn't?' He muttered as he was led away sobbing.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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