Little Red Riding Hood Admits "When Big Bad Wolf Tried To Eat Me, It Was Consentual"

Funny story written by Throckmorton Turdblossom

Wednesday, 2 December 2009

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My, what a big tonge he had!

In a press conference held in her late Grandmother's house, Little Red Riding Hood has admitted that she lied in her allegations against the Big Bad Wolf. "When I said that he tried to eat me that one night forty years ago, it was actually consentual. No, no, that's not the full truth. I really asked him to do it."

"When my marriage to the friendly woodman broke apart who thought he saved my life broke apart, I should have come clean then. I couldn't, however, admit it because oral sex was not spoken of in public thirty years ago. It is only recently that it has become more acceptable to talk about it."

"I wish to apologize to the family of the wolf...his wife and children or any other relatives that may be living. I was not a very nice girl and I kind of came on to him....asking him to go skinny dipping with me and inviting him to do other things. But, in my own defense, my what a long tongue he had!"

"When he said the better to eat you with, my dear, I knew that I had to have him. I'm just sorry that the woodsman cut him open to get grandma out, because the sex was really great up until then."

Relatives of the big bad wolf are holding off on a lawsuit at present. "We're currently involved in litigation against three little pigs, and don't want to be involved in two court actions at once."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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