LAS VEGAS, NV - Jackson 5 patriarch Joe "ol' Devil Eyebrows" Jackson claims to have found the next big thang in music, i.e., God help us, a new Jackson 5.
The five, who range in age from 4 to 39, all were found in and around Las Vegas - two failed croupiers from the Orgasmia Casino Resort, a small boy left unattended in a schoolyard, a fry cook at a local Greaseburger's and Pelvis Washington, an African-American former Elvis impersonator.
Mr. Jackson says he already has begun their musical and dance training. "I just got out my ol' belt and started whackin'. The harmonies and groovin' moves really came together!"
It is unclear when the quintet will officially be sprung on the public, or if Mr. Jackson intends to be their manager or only their overseer. Booking inquiries are being handled by the PR firm of Noe Reilly Notkydding of Reno.
