David "Randy Postman" Letterman has firmly promised his affairs are over and no more surprise packages are waiting in the letterboxes!
He's even been joking about licking the "stamps" of his female workforce and stuffing his packages in their open "Fe-Mail-Boxes"!
Now if David had been a normal randy Postie nobody on the planet would have "black-mailed" him, but being the US superstar talkmaster that he is, some clown thought it was worth the effort, couple a million here or there, who gives a shit!
Obviously the "Black-Mailer" didn't reckon with Lettermans response by joking about his affairs on his fab late night show, virtually telling him (or her) to go and shove his registered letters up his butt!!
Letterman's suffering wife has pleaded with her "Randy Postmen" to go on Oprah's show, with his "ZIP-code" firmly shut and pray for forgiveness only then will she be prepared to receive his ageing, viagra, driven postal- packages again!
If not she'll sue the leacherous bastard for every dollar he owns + she'll make sure he gets his dirty dipstick caught between his "ZIP-Code" OUCH!!!
It's over to you Oprah!!
