Jessica Simpson surprised her audience last night by stopping her show long enough to yell, "Do you want a big surprise?"
When the crowd agreed, Jessica began removing her clothes.
As the audience sat there stunned, she yelled again, "Guess what? I've been wearing this fat wrap for months to see who really liked the real me and who didn't!"
"So, what do you think now?"
But there was no body wrapping except some mummy like see-through gauze and what it permitted for everyone to see was quite a bit of fat!
"Wait a minute! I know this isn't the real me. Somebody bring me a knife so I can cut this stuff off me."
That was when everyone made a hasty exit!
At last report, several people rushed onto the stage after a word from Jessica's manager and rushed her to a fat clinic in Minnesota.
"She's in self-denial", stated one person, today, at the clinic. She apparently believes that someone has placed a fat suit on her and that all that ice cream, etc is from some kind of yak's milk that helps you lose weight. Whoever would do such a thing to a nice looking lady, well, he or she is a stinker and I apologize for the bad language.
Meanwhile Tony Romo stunk up the ballgame in Dallas last weekend, just as Jessica stunk up her show last night. Maybe they do belong together.