Los Angeles, CA - A video circulating the web titled 'Unknown Life Form in North Carolina Sewer' could actually be video of the Michael Jackson autopsy. While police have yet to confirm this suspicion, many amateur forensic pathologists have positively identified it as such.
Amateur forensic pathologist, Leroy Jones, of Compton in Los Angeles states, "...well da video gots all da hallmarks uh a journey through some homies intestinal tract, that's fo' sho'. However, where dis one differentiates itself from da average video be da movin', pulsatin' wads uh livin', breathin' fecal material. Dis be sho'ly only seen in someone whose diet might have consisted uh res-toe-rant food; snatch-out o' feed-in. In particular, dis be res-toe-rant food consumed at mo'e uh da higher end boutique res-toe-rants in da Beverly Hills crib. Although they have a fabalus reputation fo' only usin high quality ingredients, by da time dis stuff gets from da kitchen to plate to all da way down da intestinal tract, dat kin dig fine nasty lookin'."
Mr. Jones concluded, "...that's why ah' likes to stick to da usual 'big ass Mac, supersize Coke 'n fries. It's my mantra. By da time dat stuff gets to yo' mouth, it's fine well wasted. They kill every livin' o'ganism in dat just by da way they cook it. And if dat ain't wasted by da time dat reaches yo' stomach, well, a nice helping uh Coke will extin'uish enny life form that's left over. Needless to say, that's not what we see be happenin' here."
