Written by Bureau

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

image for The Guiding Light, 72-Year Old Soap, Switching Off!
Brought To You By Post Toasties & Ovaltine"

The "golden oldie" of soap operas, "The Guiding Light" is finally switching off after a 72-year run that predates the television.

CBS says the show will have its final episode in September. Like most other daytime dramas, "Guiding Light" has suffered from declining ratings and CBS is looking for a lower-cost alternative to the hour of programming.

"Plus some of these guys are over a hundred years old and have to wear make-up 24 hours a day", stated one CBS official. "And the 'old people's smell' was making it harder and harder to keep any newcomers to stay on. I mean, I can't stay around there for very long, myself."

The Big Book of World Records has cited it as the longest-running television drama ever.

The very first episode aired as a 15-minute serial on NBC Radio in January 1937 and debuted on CBS television in 1952, focusing on the Bauer family of Springfield.

"Whoo Hooo! We're going back to wadio! There goes mi teef!" yelled someone they were helping off the stage while we were leaving.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more