The BBC has tonight revealed that aging crooner, David Bowie, is to be the new Doctor Who, succeeding Scottish actor David Tennant, who is leaving the show to concentrate on his first love, Porn Films.
Bowie, pronounced BOH-EE (with the BOH as in NO), has appeared in several noteworthy Hollywood movies including The Man Who Fell To Earth, Labyrinth and Merry Christmas, Mr Lawrence, and impressed BBC producers with his weirdness and piercing stare.
A style guru and inspiration behind many millions of bisexuals and androgynes worldwide, Bowie is ranked at number 29 on the list of 100 Greatest Britons, and, as such, is the highest-ranking British hermaphrodite ever to have had a number 1 single.
Described as sounding like "Tommy Steele with a sore throat", Bowie will take over from Tennant in the new series of Doctor Who in the New Year.
