Pantomime Favourite Widow Twanky has remarried Guy Ritchie. Mr Madonna's money, fell in love with Aladdin's mother, when attending a recent pantomime in Plymouth.
An onlooker Greg Lake, who was there to see Father Christmas said " I was having a great time singing along to that giant Karoke, which they have a pantomimes. When this tall bloke with his pockets stuffed full of money sat next to me. He could not take his steel blue eyes off Mrs Twanky and he just sat there, with a foolish grin on his face, throught-out the whole performance".
It is believed that, Mr Ritchie, went back-stage and proposed to Mrs Twanky, who has been a widow since 1903, immediately. Aladdin who is played by Isla Fisher on Wednesdays, some bird from Hollyoaks on Fridays, Diane Vickers on Sundays and Miley Cyrus, the rest of the week - was believed to be furious with the union.
The wedding was attended by Cinderella, Puss-in-boots, Jack and his Beanstalk lover and Danny La-Rue. 'A great time was had by all' said said Scrooge. "Widow Twanky is Guy's idea of an ideal woman, we haven't the heart to tell him... she is a man in very bad drag. However he has been married to Madonna for the last decade, so I don't think he'll care!"
Widow Twanky's wife, of thirty years is said to be distraught, with her husbands 'new marriage'. "He is now buying drag artists, like his wife buys black kiddies, from Africa. Can nobody stop this disgustingly rich, disgusting pair!"