Written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 24 November 2008

image for Sir Trevor McDonald To Host New ITV Show 'Strictly Come Newsreading'

Veteran newsreader Sir Trevor McDonald has made his last appearance as co-presenter of ITV's News at Ten, but, in the biggest shock of the day, he has been offered a new contract presenting ITV's new show, Strictly Come Newsreading.

Sir Trevor, 79, hosted News at Ten from 1992 to 1999, and then again from January 2008, when the show was revived. Last month, he announced his intention to give up newsreading for good, but this new offer will enable 'McDonald', as he is sometimes known, to promote Newsreading to the masses in an entertaining way.

'McDonald' has already lined up several other newsreaders including Nicholas Wichell, Angela Rippon, Moira Stewart, Anna Ford, Richard Baker Kate Adie, Jeremy Paxman, John Humphrys, Natasha Kaplinsky, sexbomb Kate Silverton, John Sergeant, Bill Turnbull, Rageh Omaar and Huw Edwards but not Carol Barnes, who died recently.

The newsreaders will each be asked to 'perform the news', and will then be judged by a panel of judges including McDonald himself. Emphasis will be on clarity, artistic style and mannerisms, with Edwards' curling lip likely to be a winner in this respect.

The public will then be asked to cast its votes by telephone, and the results will be broadcast on the News at Ten, but probably nowhere else.

Sounds like a right load of old shit, doesn't it?

And finally...

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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