Vital Bush-era questions answered as Hustler signs Spitzer call girl for $5 million centerfold

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 13 March 2008


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New York - (Bare Ass Mess): Key political mysteries of the 21st century are about to be revealed with Hustler magazine's announcement today that it has signed a $5 million 10-page centerfold deal with Gov Spitzer's call girl Ashley Alexandra Dupre.

Dupre - also known as Ashley Youmans - first rose to international stardom in the UK in 2003 when BBC Newsnight anchor Jeremy Paxman famously interviewed Tony Blair about his intimate, deeply spiritual, quasi-religious whore-on-terra relationship with George W Bush, with those now notorious words:

"Dupre together then, you and the President?"

Blair blushed furiously and refused to answer as the cameras nearly shattered at the sudden hard-on the UK Prime Monster was unable to conceal in front of an estimated 20 million TV viewers.

And now, some five years later, the Hustler's scoop will feature all the brazilianed glory of Ms Dupre's fabulously luscious body as she takes off all her clothing - v-e-r-y, v-e-r-y s-l-o-w-l-y - while the cameras roll and the lenses snap.

Dupre will also talk intimately about the twenty of the political superstars she has "pleasured, bedded, mentored, counseled, consoled, hosed down and generally given the Miss Rubber Whiplash treatment to" in a career spanning sixty nine glorious months."

"It's a nude photo-montage featuring the glamor of first-class inter-state rail travel, powerful Wall Street Sherrifs, exotic assignments in deluxe hotels and the joy of burgeoning bank accounts flowing with hard-earned $$$s."

The Easter edition of the magazine is out on Saturday 22 March, $10 a copy.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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