Vlodrop, Netherlands - (Rioters): Transcendental meditation con-artist and self-styled Beatles' guru Maharishi Mahesh Yogi has died after a lifetime of self-medicating with LSD, crack cocaine and offshore bank account donation overdoses.
Yogi, 91, was listed by NATO military Intelligence in the world top 10 ranking of Global Piss Process arseholes including General Pinochet, Roberto 'God's Banker' Calvi, the Queen Mother, Princess Diana, Robert Maxwell, Timothy Leary and 99.9% of the Bush family.
He leaves behind a vacuous legacy which may yet be filled by Philip Berg, Kabbalistic spiritual mentor to Madonna-Kebab.
The Maharishi accumulated over $100 million in personal donations during his lifetime, most of it from organised crime cartels in the pay of George W Bush.
A lifelong piss-artist, Yogi was a five bottles of Jack Daniels-a-day man despite preaching abstinence and self-degradation.
He leaves behind up to 60 children, 400+ grandchildren and unpaid medical bills for the treatment of unchecked incest-related syndrome.
Paul McCartney is 69.