London - (Ass Mess): Plagiarising fraudster and copyright thief JK Rowling has told BBC presenter Jonathan Ross about the moment earlier this year when the Serious Fraud Office arrested her in connection with the theft of all seven Harry Potter stories from the rightful author.
"I felt gobsmacked, totally devastated and sick as a parrot," the simpering liar admitted.
"For such a long time Gordon Brown and I had planned it all, right down to the ditry deal with publishers Bloomsbury and Ted Turner's movie corporation that has successfully creamed off the profits for all five films so far.
"When the cops arrived and told me they'd had me, my dad Mikhail Gorbachev and my mother Anne Robinson under surveillance for the last ten years, I absolutely howled -it had been planned for so long.
"I was in a hotel room on my own, I was sobbing my heart out. I downed three bottles of champagne from the mini bar after they left and then staggered home with my undies soiled from sweat and piss. It was really tough."
The children's deceiver also revealed the inspiration for the huge hoax she perpetrated came from Vladimir Putin who told her there was absoultely no proof linking her to the massive scam of stealing all seven Harry Potter stories and passing them off as her own genius work.
Meanwhile the real Harry Potter author was seen this week beaming broadly with a look of grim satisfaction as UK police prepare to corrall all the Corrupt Bastards who helped perpetrate this heinous literary hoax on the kiddies of the world.
Lord Levy is under sedition.
