LOS ANGELES - With new release of his smash hit single PopoZão topping the charts in the North Pole and Neverland, Kevin Federline has finally emerged as a force to reckon with in the music industry. His "Jamaican rump shaker" beats are sure to get any party ended.
The slow-witted Federline has always seen himself as a sure-shot success, but critics are eager to him write-off as the next Mozart, but black. PopoZão fever is a recent rising epidemic in the villages surrounding Honduras. It is quickly spreading and some virologists are even exclaiming, "PopoZão fever might even hit the US sometime around never. "
Although some researchers will say being hearing-impaired is the only way to cure PopoZão fever, eating cancer remains the #1 treatment in the highly-affected regions.
The symptoms of PopoZão fever include sudden urges to utter Barbara Streisand hooks, a newfound preference in track-lighting, and a discovered hatred towards meat.
A growing number of fans have also known to become increasingly ill as the song draws near a close. Federline has been quoted with reasoning towards this accusation by saying, "I think it's because of my incredible talent. People can't seem to follow the intelligence behind my words, so they get whirl-winded by my great beats. Do you guys validate that parking garage?"
Matt Warzel
