Sony to Release New Comedy Depicting Assassination of President Obama-- No Protests, No Outcry, No Nothing. Bill O'Reilly Says: 'It's Just a Joke.'

Funny story written by Michael Egan

Thursday, 25 December 2014

image for Sony to Release New Comedy Depicting Assassination of President Obama-- No Protests, No Outcry, No Nothing. Bill O'Reilly Says: 'It's Just a Joke.'

Following the PR success of The Interview, Sony Pictures announced today that it would be releasing Alluha Akbar!, an uproarious new comedy about the assassination of President Barack Obama.

The movie is financed by the government of North Korea and was filmed on location in Pyongyang.

Starring funnymen Bill Murray as Li'l Jamie Crow, and Tom Hanks as Cliven Bundy's lovable brother Ted, those wacky KKK activists are at it again! Disguised as simple-minded tea-party protestors, the two bumbling racists incredibly-let's call it comedic license-scale the White House fence and walk in through the front door unchallenged!

Up the stairs and down the hall, in one of the movie's most hilarious scenes, they find Obama kneeling on his prayer mat in the Oval Office. In the background weird African music plays.

The rest of this thigh-slapping moment involves the enhanced interrogation of the president, including wildly humorous depictions of waterboarding and rectal rehydration until Obama finally admits he was born in Kenya. Some rather obvious puns on his name are made, and Dick Cheney has a brief cameo appearance playing himself, via Skype. His catch-phrase is, "Well, I'd do it again!"

At the end of the movie Obama is handed over to ISIS and, amidst universal laughter, is put through Jihad John's familiar slapstick routine. Over the closing credits you can hear Cheney laughing, "Well, I'd do it again!"

In the US, the FBI have paid no attention whatever to the movie's release because of course its production and performances are protected by the First Amendment.

The Ku Klux Klan, Tea Party and the GOP congressional leadership have also welcomed its appearance and are making no attempt to block Alluha Akbar!'s release by legal action, threatening theaters or audiences, or in any way interfering with its appearance next week in over 3000 outlets nationwide. Like all Americans, they too recognize the absolute purview of free speech and artistic expression.

"Hell, it's just a comedy, a joke," said commonsensical old Bill O'Reilly. "Why would any government get upset about a movie depicting the humiliation and assassination of its president?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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