Joan Rivers Confesses That She Wants To Be Anderson Cooper's Sugar Mama

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 26 March 2014

image for Joan Rivers Confesses That She Wants To Be Anderson Cooper's Sugar Mama
Joan Rivers (R) and an unidentified friend on their way to buy some bagels.

NEW YORK CITY - It appears that Anderson Cooper has become a very popular non-straight dude as lately he has had Cher and Kathy Griffin fighting over his attention and now Joan Rivers has come into the fray.

Joan "The Queen of Mean" Rivers appeared on The Gorgeous Gary Busey Show and confessed that she is infatuated with Anderson Cooper and added that she would love to be his sugar mama.

Rivers said that when she first met Cooper at a White House state dinner, one look into his sky blue eyes and she almost forgot that she was Jewish.

She said that she got so tongue-tied that all she could say was Iwaaaa-maaaa-faaaa.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I'm afraid that other than Rivers the only other person who could possibly translate that is Ozzy Osbourne.]

When Anderson was told that 80-year-old Joan Rivers wanted him to be her boy toy and she'd be his sugar mama, he asked, "Ah, how old is she again? and EXACTLY how much is the bitch worth?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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