Kirstie Alley Challenges Leah Remini to Secret Sacred Scientology Duel

Funny story written by Al N.

Monday, 9 December 2013

image for Kirstie Alley Challenges Leah Remini to Secret Sacred Scientology Duel
Alley and Remini in the Secret Super Scientology Dueling Suits

Clearwater, FL Kirstie Alley today challenged Leah Remini to a Secret Sacred Scientology Duel. Even though Ms. Remini has quit the church, she does not want to be called a chicken by Ms. Alley and has consented to the duel.

Details about the Secret Sacred Scientology Duel are secret, but some of it has leaked via Tony Ortega's blog, the Underground Bunker.

The duel consists of each participant staring at the other for two hours for a warm-up. Then yelling at each and at ashtrays is the next activity. After this drill, an e-meter is brought out and whoever has given the other the most engrams wins the round.

The next rounds involve driving body thetans from one participant's body to another. The one who ends up with the least body thetans wins the round.

And finally, both will be interviewed by Barbara Walters. Whichever one cries first is the loser.

Thanks to N. Graham for his assistance with the challenging research.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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