Katy Perry Told By Her Closest Friends That John Mayer Will Break Her Heart (Again!)

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 31 October 2013

LOS ANGELES - One thing that can be said about Russell Brand's ex-wife, Katy Perry, is that the woman is certainly one of the most stubborn individuals in Tinsel Town.

Perry has been warned by several of her dearest friends that she had better end her relationship with John "The Player" Mayer because he will only end up dumping her and breaking her heart yet again.

The Mayer-Perry relationship has had more ups and downs than the Empire State Building elevators.

Katy has truly become smitten with the spineless Casanova who has a history of dating women and then dumping them once he has hit a few home runs.

Several prominent names on Mayer's List of Ex-Girlfriends include Ke$ha, Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, and Taylor Swift just to name four.

But Perry says that she is different. She recently told Carolina Chipotle with Bedroom Pillow Talk that Johnny has told her that she is special because he has never experienced the amazing mattress merriment that he has with her.

Interestingly enough Miss Chipotle noted that Mayer said the same exact thing about Jennifer Aniston and Jessica Simpson.

Katy still insists that one day she will become Mrs. John Mayer and the reason she is sure of it is because Johnny has told her that all of the other girls were blondes and she is a brunette.

SIDENOTE: Katy, with the big ping pong ball sized eyes, has fallen hook, line, sinker, and BS, for the man that Rush Limbaugh has called The Walking Weiner.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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