Justin Bieber's Mom Pleads With Him To Enter Into A Rehab Clinic To Deal With His Anger

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 9 June 2012

image for Justin Bieber's Mom Pleads With Him To Enter Into A Rehab Clinic To Deal With His Anger
A photo of the posh Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic in Calabasas. (Photo by Paris Hilton).

LA BREA - Justin Bieber's mom Pattie Mallette, 36, was in La Brea visiting the world famous La Brea Tar Pits.

She was quietly sitting in the La Brea Tar Pits Diner lunching on a Pancho Villa Deluxe Chicken Fajita Plate when she was approached by Margarita Mixx of The Tinsel Town Times Tribune.

Miss Mixx politely asked Mrs. Mallette if she could join her. Mrs. Mallette graciously told her that it would be fine.

The 5T reporter noticed that she was reading a copy of noted anger management expert Alvina McSquiffy.

McSquiffy has written over a dozen books including the one Mrs. Mallette was reading, Why Some Kids With Pretty Much Everything Angrily Feel That Someone Is Always Trying To Bring Them Down To Their Level.

Miss Mixx asked about the book and was told that it had been a gift from one of her son's biggest fans Lurleen Jo Tottytissy, 47, of Porcupine, South Dakota.

Mrs. Mallette stated that the reason Mrs. Tottytissy, who has 14 biological children, sent her the book was due to her concern regarding Justin's extremely erratic behavior of late.

It is no secret that lately JB has exhibited an unusually hot tempered side of him that no one had ever seen before.

Even his longtime girlfriend Selena Gomez remarked that lately Justy's mind seems to be somewhere else.

Gomez revealed that last week she asked a very pensive Justin what he was thinking about.

She confessed that he told her that he was thinking about moving to France and joining the French Foreign Legion or maybe moving to Upper Shambutu and becoming a lion hunter.

Justin's mom noted that she and Selena first noticed an obvious change in Justin when he started taking boxing lessons from Mike Tyson, wrestling lessons from Hulk Hogan, and basketball lessons from Metta World Peace.

And last week when he attacked a supermarket tabloid photographer for no apparent reason, it clearly showed that the young singer is under a tremendous amount of stress and needs to get into anger management classes.

Selena even noted that when the two recently went to one of the couples favorite all-time places, The Tarzan & Jane Petting Zoo in Tarzana, that JB did not pet any of the animals.

She said she realized something was wrong because he usually spends at least 12 minutes petting his favorite petting zoo animal Chucky The Chicken.

But that particular time he just walked around by himself and quietly kept whistling the song "We Gotta Get Out Of This Place" by The Animals.

Mrs. Mallette said that she has texted her son and has pleaded with him to please check himself into The Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic to deal with his tremendous anger issues.

She even told him that if he agrees to do it she will bake him a bowl of his favorite cookies, Macadamia Nut Oatmeal Blueberry with Caramel Swirls.

STORY FOOTNOTE: The Tinsel Town Times Tribune has an inside source who is employed at the rehab clinic and 5T will be the first entertainment news agency to provide any breaking stories once Justin checks in.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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