Dancing With The Stars Welsh Singer Katherine Jenkins Is Warned By Fellow Welshman Steve Jones Ex-Host of The X-Factor About Mark "The Lark" Ballas

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 3 April 2012

image for Dancing With The Stars Welsh Singer Katherine Jenkins Is Warned By Fellow Welshman Steve Jones Ex-Host of The X-Factor About Mark "The Lark" Ballas
A recent photo of the table in Simon Cowell's breakfast nook. (Photo by Britney Spears).

HOLLYWOOD - One of the most beautiful contestants to ever appear on Dancing With The Stars, Katherine Jenkins of Wales, has just received a word of warning from a fellow countrymen.

Miss Jenkins, a fabulous opera singer, received a text message from Steve Jones warning her about her dance partner Mark Ballas.

Jones, the host of X-Factor was fired by Simon "The Count of Cruelty" Cowell this past January due to his robotic personality and the fact that it was very difficult for the American viewing audience to understand what he was saying.

Cowell, also fired X-Factor judges Paula "Touchdown" Abdul and Nicole "Teardrops" Scherzinger in one fell swoop.

Jones informed the gorgeously stunning 31-year-old Katherine not to fall for Mark's countless romantic lines.

He said that last year Mark "The Lark," as Maksim Chmerkovskiy has tagged him, waltzed right in and swept American Idol's Pia Toscano right off her feet.

Ballas took her to Catalina Island; Cabo San Lucas, Mexico; St. Barts, West Indies; and Terre Haute, Indiana.

And according to Pico de Gallo of Tittle Tattle Tonight Ballas actually came very close to asking Toscano to marry him.

But Dancing With The Stars rules and regulations strictly prohibit any of the professional dancers from getting married to anyone who has appeared on either DWTS or any other reality show such as American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance, Cupcake Wars, or The Real Housewives of Intercourse, Pennsylvania.

Bedroom Pillow Talk recently noted that Ms. Abdul is still devastated at being suddenly terminated from her $15 million a year job and has lost so much weight she is beginning to look like LeAnn Rimes, except shorter, giddier, and permanently suntanned.

3T's de Gallo noted that Katherine's mom Susan Jenkins is with her and she has heard about the reputation of the touchy-touchy, feely-feely Mark Ballas.

Mrs. Jenkins has informed Katherine that if "Tippy Toes" does anything that she deems to be inappropriate to let her know and she will report him to the Welsh consulate, the Welsh ambassador, and Vice-President Joe Biden.

In late breaking news. The African country of Loombeezi has apologized for accidentally attacking Greenland. A spokesperson for the government of Loombeezi stated that his country will remove the 7 canoes and 28 troops immediately.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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