Ian Somerhalder and Nina Dobrev To Star In The Vampire Thriller "There's A Bloody App For That"

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 28 March 2012

image for Ian Somerhalder and Nina Dobrev To Star In The Vampire Thriller "There's A Bloody App For That"
FuFi Fondue's twin FiFi Fondue will appear in the film as Suzette The Sultress of Erotic Eroticism.

LOS ANGELES - The temperature in Tinsel Town was hovering in the mid-90s and Venice Beach was brimming with beach goers wearing every color and design of micro swimsuits imaginable.

Two of the most famous Venice Beach visitors were Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder, stars of the cable hit The Vampire Diaries.

The fun-filled couple frolicked to and fro on the sun-drenched beach sand as they made small talk about Snooki Polizzi (4'9"), Danny Devito (4'10"), and Kristen Chenoweth (4'11").

Dobrev and Somerhalder recently spoke with Tequila Tallyho of Left Coast Mirror Magazine. They said that they were thrilled that they were going to be co-starring with Russell Brand, Mila Kunis, and Megan Fox in the Charleen Belle Pinnzucker vampire thriller There's A Bloody App For That.

The film which is an adaptation of noted Bulgarian vampire story writer Pankovo "Dimples" Gabropol will be produced by TouchRock Productions in association with Cinema Castle Films and Quixotic Windmill Pictures.

Miss Tallyho noted that Somerhalder, Dobrev, Brand, and Kunis will all portray vampires while Fox will star as a sensuously sultry computer programmer, Melody "Miss Yummy Yum" Mastermeister, who invents software that can be programmed to detect vampires.

The amazingly futuristic software was tested in Transylvania during a 13-month research test study and it proved to be effective 99.9 percent of the time.

The motion picture will take place in Sighisoara, Transylvania, which is regarded as The Vampire Capital of the World.

Ms. Pinnzucker disclosed that the movie will actually be filmed on location in Ponchatoula, Louisiana, which bears a striking resemblance to Sighisoara, Transylvania, down to the garlic fields, the extensive bat population, and that slight vampire fang smell that permeates the air.

Noted hair stylist to the stars FuFi Fondue, owner of The Haven of Hair Salon in Beverly Hills will serve as the film's hair stylist and eyeliner consultant.

Fondue's twin sister FiFi Fondue, who was Pinnzucker's roommate at Left Coast College in Carpinteria, California, has been given a secondary role in the film. She will be portraying Suzette The Sultress of Erotic Eroticism.

SIDENOTE: Charleen Belle Pinnzucker has directed three previous vampire movies. The Motion Picture Film Institute of Vietnam named Pinnzucker's Snow White and The Horny Vampire Hunters From Hungary as The Best Motion Picture of 2011.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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