Sandra Buttock's Newest Fashion Accessory

Funny story written by TAR

Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Hey!

The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Sandra Buttock's Newest Fashion Accessory
Excuse me, I got a black baby here!

Sandra Buttock has been photographed clutching this season's ultimate in airport fashion accessory chic - a black baby. It seems that any celebrity worth her weight in liposuction and unrelenting man problems is being digitally snapped in a litany of airports toting a black baby like its part of her entourage of Sara Michelle Gabber designer luggage.

Girl-next-door personified Buttock continues a weird trend started most famously by the likes of slap happy Naomi Campbellton and the squid lipped live-in of super hunk Brat Pitt that dictates that Hollywood's mega super elite should not even consider leaving the house without wearing a black baby flown in from a third-world country or somewhere outside the universe.

"I've never actually watched any of Buttock's low budget slap stick movies, albeit I was likely out of popcorn during the HBO release, but then again I am not sure they would enlighten me intellectually," reported Sonya Soho Gotlieb.

Anyway, Buttock's back catalogue of generic movies aside, the fashionable black baby can be worn on either the left or the right side of the body; draped or cradled.

Buttock adopted the black baby who she named Louis after Louis Armstrong (because he is black too) after she slipped out of the sling with her super famous husband Jesse Jamin. Jamin quickly moved on to the gorgeous, beautiful and talented Kat Van Deep - the mega picture encrusted delicious tattoo artist. Jamin described his life with Buttock as the dullest, agonizing and wasted time of his life. He also said that she was more interested in watching her boring DVD movies over and over and over, than having hot rod sex or doing anything else that requires thinking. "It was strange when Sandra started watching 'Diff'rent Strokes'," says Jamin.

Adopting a child from a third world country is a must have, the ultimate Oscar red carpet show now in Hollywood. Other white celebrities who have adopted black children include Spielberger, Skidman and Jackmen. "There doesn't seem to be a trend for black actors to adopt white children but then again white children clearly aren't as fashionable In Hollywood as we speak," quipped Sonya.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more