Britney Spears Sells The Nudist Resort She Bought In 2009

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 18 October 2011

image for Britney Spears Sells The Nudist Resort She Bought In 2009
Britney performing her hit song "Womanizer" on "Live With Regis & Kelly."

HOLLYWOOD, California - Britney Spears appeared on The View and was asked about the rumor that she had recently come into quite a bit of money due to a sale she recently made.

Spears told Joy Behar that the rumor was in fact true. She said that she had just sold a nudist resort located in Petaluma which she had purchased in 2009.

Behar asked her what the name of the resort was. Britney giggled as she said The Naked As A Jaybird Nudist Resort.

Whoopi (Goldberg) asked her why she had decided to sell it. She replied that since she is not touring as much as she used to due in part to that Australian lip syncing mess, she is having to do something to bring in some revenue in order to maintain the lavish lifestyle that she has become accustomed to.

Goldberg asked her why she didn't just sell one or two of her half dozen expensive cars. Britney said that it was out of the question because each one was special and each one had been featured in dozens of photos during her getting out of the car with no panties on days.

Barbara Walters asked her if she ever regretted showing the whole civilized world her entire muffin. Britney blushed and asked Walters why she would even ask her such a bitchful question like that.

Walters rolled her eyes and told her not to act so surprised because she knew she was going to ask her that question because they had talked it over before the show.

"Okay, Babs" Spears stated, "So I guess that you're one of those types who likes for the magician to reveal how he did the trick."

"Ah no," Walters quipped, "I'm just one of those forward bitches who is not afraid to ask anyone anything at all."

"Stop it!" Yelled out Elisabeth (Hasselbeck) as she pointed to Walters. "Barbara you are just embarrassing her because Britney just happens to be a Republican."

Spears got a puzzled look on her face and asked, "I am?"

"Hey Brit, girlfriend, you said that without even lip syncing" quipped Sherri Shepherd.

Joy Behar told everyone to back off because she was the one who was interviewing the little lip syncer. She caught herself and said that she meant to say the little blonde singer who had a big hit with the song "Oops I Did It Again."

"Okay, so tell me Spears" Behar asked, "How much did you get for the nudist resort?"

"Oh, I don't ever reveal any financial figures since it is really no one's business but mine." Britney said smiling.

Behar took out her cell phone. She dialed a number. "Hey Ryan, how much did Britney Spears sell her nudist resort for?"

"$13.8 million. Okay thanks Ryan. Bye hon."

The Ryan that Joy Behar called up was Ryan Seacrest who knows a lot about pretty much everybody.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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