Ryanair Profits Up - Warns Over Next Year: Non-Fliers To Meet Costs

Funny story written by Ellis Ian Fields

Tuesday, 24 May 2011

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Controversial budget air carrier Ryanair has reported 374m euros (£325m) annual profit - 23 per cent up on last year.

The strong results, to the year ending March 31, were achieved in the face of cancellations due to volcanic ash, snow and strikes.

But the airline says that fuel costs and lack of increase in capacity would mean no profit rise next year - unless they implement a new charge.

EIF News & Features ravel editor Peregrine Trip says: "Although the next year doesn't look promising, Ryanair are pretty good at raising revenues - charging for checking baggage, meals, using the loo and so on.

"My sources tell me that they plan to charge air passengers for not flying with them: passengers intending to fly with other airlines will face a surcharge at the departure gates.

"The size of the surcharge will depend on the carrier the passenger is using and the destination - if it's somewhere Ryanair services, the cost could be pretty punitive."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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