London - (Offshore Hydrocarbons Mess): The reclusive satire writer recently reported as having regained membership of the highest profile US piggy bank club aka the Dow Jones Industrial Index has told NYC financial paper Off the Wall Street Journal she plans to diversify investment programs for her personal Soverign Wealth Funds.
"Some major acquisition decisions are now in the Jack 2 pipeline," Mrs X said today, "following our satisfactory inspections of the Gorgon gas fields in Australia.
"Minor criminal glitches like Prince Jefri Archer's attempts to seize control of a number of Asian branches of the Sovereign Funds were seen off with aplomb in late 2007," Mrs X added.
"Our retained lawyers in the Privet Council - the legal enforcer of our successful litigation against Bush Kleptocracy-operated hedge funds - have filed for motions to dismiss any remaining obstacles in Capitol Hill also responsible for sleepwalking millions of American voters into a state of narcoleptic sumbission.
"A low profile operational policy has succeeded in bugging the buggers who took out illicit wiretaps on our domains.
"Diversifications into hyrdogen-driven power options will now be all the rage on Off-the-Wall Street, I predict."
ExxonMobil executives are quaking in their boots.
